Struggling

I turned 57 this week and while I had lovely run and lunch with friends to celebrate, this was a landmark birthday and my situation has really hit home.

You see my youngest turned 18 in April so legally my parenting responsibilities ended there.

Obviously I accepted a long time ago that I would be caring for my disabled daughter B for life.

But my youngest does not have an intellectual disability so I absolutely assumed that providing full time care for him would end this year.

It hasn’t.

There is no time scale on when it might and I just feel my life is really over now.

It’s not as though I’m any good at parenting him, the best I can say is that I’ve kept him alive. It’s not much of an achievement.

Why am I telling you this?

Because I don’t think I can manage a cheerful post this week, and anything I have half heartedly drafted is too angry for publication, so there will probably be fewer posts on here until I can get my head around things.

Thanks for reading.

 

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8 thoughts on “Struggling

  1. If I had one request from the universe this week it would be to find a solution for you with real help and long term arrangements. So I’m going to try requesting just that. You never know, it’s worked before. Lots of love . xxx #TheSecret

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your parenting has absolutely nothing to do with how your child (adult) is. You have two other children who who have excelled to their best possibility and you need to always remember that.
    The failure of the state to provide proper services for your youngest for most of his life since his problems began have caused this 😦
    There are many (great parents!) in similar situations with no help, no support, and the state have wiped their hands as the child is now a (non functioning) adult 😭

    Thinking of you as always,
    Aud x

    Liked by 1 person

  3. My heart breaks for you, Candi. I so wish I had something helpful to say or that I could do something to help you. Just know I’m pulling for you and sending you all manner of good mojo and hoping with everything in me that help arrives soon. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. My heart hurts reading this. I am sure that you have put a lot of work into keeping your son alive and getting him to adulthood. It is harder than many realise. X

    Liked by 1 person

  5. When I read your words about your life being over now my heart just broke for you and I just wanted to give you the biggest hug and tell you everything will be alright and that it would really be alright. You are such an amazing inspirational lady and you have been so badly let down by support services or lack of support services. All I can do is pray for you, it’s got to be worth a try xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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